#99: Long-term relationships

The problem of gender relations at Notre Dame is one of the biggest complaints people have about student life at the school.  Students complain that the combination of single-sex dorms and parietals is a system of the past that discourages friendship between the sexes (see #63).  The continuance of dorm parties being informally restricted to men’s halls (see #98) even further separates the genders on a day-to-day basis and leads to awkwardness at all turns. 

The result of these things is that men and women at Notre Dame do not often foster actual friendships with each other or even really go on informal dates with one another.  Instead, men and women at Notre Dame consistently find their sole interaction in long-term relationships.

Notre Dame does not have a significant dating culture.  One day, Notre Dame Students are hooking up together, and the next day sees them turning around Claddagh rings (see #6) and changing Facebook statuses to show and tell the world that they have entered into a relationship.  The lack of dating at Notre Dame stems not only from the complete lack of avenues to develop rich friendships between the sexes, but it also is caused by the lack of nearby dating options.  Although this could be changing with the recently opened Eddy Street Commons, the fact that Notre Dame exists in its own little bubble, distinctly separated from the outside, leaves students with few places to go on dates beyond the dining halls.  While “dining hall dates” are certainly popular, their awkwardness is a further detractor from a dating culture in general.

However, the lack of a dating culture does not mean a lack of relationships.  Notre Dame Students love entering into long-term relationships primarily because they love the idea of marriage (see #91), but also because they love all of the things that go along with long-term relationships. 

Notre Dame men like long-term relationships because they sometimes grant them an opportunity to go beyond the Notre Dame Hook-Up and into a new territory of intimacy (see #21).  These men have a person to consistently break parietals with, and this gives them an opportunity to show their friends and hallmates how awesome they are (even if they are not awesome at all).

Notre Dame women like long-term relationships for reasons beyond the direction of their Claddagh rings.  For women, a long-term relationship gives them a strong group of friends to hang out with that they might not have if they only hang out with other girls.  It’s no secret that Notre Dame men form stronger groups and have a more intense level of brotherhood between them than Notre Dame women, and so they are happy to allow girls into their groups when their friends begin a relationship.  Because of this, many Notre Dame women end up being better friends with their boyfriends’ hallmates than they ever were with their own hallmates.  The relationship, therefore, allows a Notre Dame woman to become a part of all the things that make men’s halls great, like room pick drama (see #80), playing video games, and the weekly hugfest known as the Rite of Peace during Sunday night dorm Mass (see #10).

Once they come together in their long- term relationships, Notre Dame Couples like all of the things that make a relationship great.  They like spooning on couches where everybody can see them (see #27), wearing each others sweatpants (see #49), and playing footsy while “studying” together in LaFortune (see #68).  They like watching Love, Actually together and arguing about how justified Mark’s actions are (see #69).  They like walking around the lakes, actual dates at Papa Vino’s, and staying in on weekend nights because they no longer need to look for dance-floor makeouts at dorm parties and Finny’s. 

Overall, Notre Dame Students like long-term relationships because they like to love and be loved.  They like the consistency that comes with a relationship, and hate having to resort to the hook- up culture.  They like to think that the person they are dating is the one they will be with for the rest of their life, that they will get married to each other in the Basilica, watch their kids become Notre Dame Students in their own right, and that they will grow old together and live happily ever after.

#97: Hating the other dining hall

When it comes to eating meals, Notre Dame Students like to do what is fastest and easiest.  Even though plenty of them have cars on campus, they rarely go to off-campus restaurants to eat, and even though there are two dining halls on campus, Notre Dame Students rarely switch between the two. 

Most students typically go to the dining hall that is closest to their dorm because it is most convenient.  They can walk there for lunch on their way to class, and they can get there quickly and without hassle for dinner.  In the winter, Notre Dame Students do this because they also like to walk through the snow from their dorms to the dining hall in athletic shorts, just to show how little the weather affects them (even though it does).

By only going to one dining hall, students grow accustomed to sitting in the same area and seeing the same people.  Students from West Quad and South Quad consistently go to South Dining Hall (referred to by saying “South” or “SDH”).  These students yell out either “right-right” or “right-left” to tell their friends where they will be sitting, and before long groups of friends know exactly what side of what aisle to look to and walk down in order to find their friends.  These groups will instinctively know second and third choice seating areas in case their chosen area is occupied or closed. 

Students from North Quad and Mod Quad consistently go to North Dining Hall (referred to by saying “North” or “NDH”).  These students will determine where to sit before they get their food, and will leave coats, flip up chairs, and place IDs on their chosen table in order to mark their territory.  While both halves of campus have their different customs in their chosen dining hall, the one thing all Notre Dame Students share is a hatred for the dining hall in which they do not regularly eat.

Students who regularly eat at South complain constantly about the “modernism” that exists at North.  They hate the fact that the dining hall has multiple levels almost as much as the televisions that exist inside it.  Furthermore, South regulars hate the fact that they can never find their friends when they eat at North.  Why, they wonder, would you waste time saving a seat with your ID, when long lines are forming in the food distribution areas?  South regulars spend inordinate amounts of time looking for their friends when they eat at North.

The biggest complaint that South regulars have about North, however, is the food distribution system.  Food stations at North are seemingly spread throughout the dining hall in a maze of doorways that is akin to a funhouse.  South patrons are used to the single room in their dining hall where they can quickly make a loop and see what the options are for dinner.  At North, most students know what they are going to get before they enter the building and make a beeline towards the room of their choice.  Because it is impossible for Southies to find food in North, they pretty much only go there when they are looking for two specific menu items unique to North: pasta stir fry and make-your-own-pizza.

North patrons have similar complaints about SDH.  They find it impossible to find their friends in the large crowded rooms of tables that all look the same (see #36), and since they aren’t regular Southies, they don’t have a proper system in place to find their friends.  Their biggest complaint, however, is the abomination that is the SDH food distribution system.  When Northies enter the center part of SDH (where the food is distributed), they see a crowded and congested mess of confusion.  There are people EVERYWHERE, with lines pushing into other lines, and people waiting in two lines at similar times.  If peppered flank steak is the meat entrée, the salad bars become engulfed in the line of steak-eaters.  If there is a particularly enticing pasta dish, there will be an impenetrable line preventing hungry eaters from getting to the pizza or waffle-making sections.  Making matters worse are the indecisive Southies who don’t intricately plan their meals ahead of time by checking the menu online.  They add to the congestion by wandering around the food area looking through all of the options before they make a choice.  If NDH is overly organized with rooms for different food, SDH is an underorganized mess of confusion that Northies will never be able to understand.

The ironic thing about dining hall loyalty at Notre Dame is that both dining halls generally serve the same food.  Sure there are some notable differences like make-your-own-pizza, but when push comes to shove, students can pretty much get the same food at either dining hall.  Because of this, while Notre Dame Students will always loathe eating in the dining hall they don’t frequent, eventually all Notre Dame Students will come to hate the repetition at BOTH dining halls, and will begin to have more trips off-campus to places like Rocco’s, Bruno’s, Chili’s, and even Red Lobster.

#86: Being Overly Proud of Their Original ID

When Notre Dame Students first arrive on campus at the beginning of Freshmen Orientation, their pictures are taken and quickly made into student ID cards that will be used throughout their time as students.  These IDs are used to enter dorms, scan for meals at the dining halls, get into football games and other events, identify themselves to overzealous NDSP officers, and purchase food with Flex Points and Domer Dollars.  IDs, therefore, are an incredibly important (yet underrated) part of student life.

While their look is fairly typical and unimpressive, the original incarnation of a student’s ID is one that most Notre Dame Students are incredibly proud.  Not only does a student’s original ID card retain their picture as they were at the beginning of their freshmen year: a time before they drank too much Keystone Light, were still intending to major in engineering, and had never considered travel to Africa (see #12, #70, and #1); but because the University feels the need to incessantly change the style of Student ID’s, their ID can also look like a relic of Notre Dame’s past.

Because of their importance in day-to-day life, Notre Dame Students always carry their ID with them; an act which allows many opportunities to lose or break them.  Student IDs are often lost by being drunkenly left at Reckers (see #14), stolen by muggers on the walk back to campus from Club 23, or simply lost in the disaster of a ridiculously messy dorm room.  Likewise, IDs can be broken out of commission when they are snapped in half by overly aggressive dining hall swipers or faded to the point of illegibility while going through the laundry.

With all of the hazards in the way of success, students that keep their original ID for all four years are immensely proud of their accomplishment.  Not only does it show how better they are than their peers when it comes to not losing or breaking things, but it also means that they have a tangible ID that might look significantly different in style and format than the IDs of the majority of the student body. 

Furthermore, if a student still has his or her ID when they graduate, they will make sure to use it for a variety of functions even though the reverse side clearly invalidates it on the day of their commencement.  Recent graduates will use their IDs to get into the student section at football games, basketball games, and pep rallies as they attempt to extend their years as students.  They will also continue to use their IDs as they visit places around the country and world to get discounted prices for commuter trains, movies, and museum exhibitions.

Overall, however, Notre Dame Students will be most proud of keeping their original ID for sentimental purposes.  They will remember it as the item that got them meals and access to their home during their four years; and they will look at the picture of their freshmen-selves and remember all of the great things they did in the four years since they were given their original ID.

#74: Giving Up THE Most Outrageous thing for Lent

Notre Dame Students love lent.  They love not seeing priests wear green every week, they love their inability to eat meat on Fridays, and they love the food the dining hall is able to prepare each Friday without meat (actually, they don’t love this at all, but hate it).  However, the most important part of Lent for Notre Dame Students is what they choose to give up for the season.

Many Notre Dame Students feel an incessant need to prove how Catholic they are to all of their peers and this desire oftentimes manifests itself by making religion a competition amongst students (see #4).  One way that Notre Dame Students can prove that they are more Catholic than other Notre Dame Students is by giving up something for Lent that is more outrageous and ridiculous than what their friends give up.

For some people these sacrifices are related to food.  Students might give up meat during all of Lent or give up something even crazier like cheese.  Some might give up Starbucks (see #22) or Reckers (see #14) while others might expand on that and give up all fried food.  Many Notre Dame girls might attempt to give up the FroYo machine, but this doesn’t last long.  Still others might take things a step further and limit or cease their consumption of alcohol during Lent. 

Many students give up completely different things ranging from using the elevator in their dorm (obviously only possible in the newer dorms) to something along the lines of the infamous Seinfeld episode, The Contest.  Other students might try to add something to their daily routine like working out more, studying more, or praying more. 

While Notre Dame Students might give many reasons for making sacrifices during Lent, deep down they all know that the things they give up for Lent are meant as a way to show other people how Catholic they are and how much more religious they are than the typical student.  All Notre Dame Students want to be the MOST Catholic student, and Lenten sacrifice is just another way to accomplish this objective.

#71: Viewpoint Wars

The Observer is one of the most loved or hated things at Notre Dame.  Some students make sure to read it every day, always checking the Question of the Day (see #46), the Viewpoint section, the front page, and (of course) the comics.  Other students almost never pick up the paper, instead opting to read the complimentary national newspapers with their dining hall meals.

However, if there is one thing that can get every Notre Dame Student to pick up and read The Observer, it is raging Viewpoint war about a controversial issue.  While some of these issues come up for a short while (such as Barack Obama speaking at commencement) and will probably never appear in the Viewpoint section again, many issues that create Viewpoint wars appear in the section on an almost annual basis.

Issues such as the unique relationship between Notre Dame and Saint Mary’s (see #43.5), the disappointing nature of the football team, bookstore basketball team names, violence off-campus, single-sex dorms, and the acceptance of LGBT students at Notre Dame appear quite frequently in the pages of the viewpoint section.  Nearly every year an incident will happen that will again bring these issues to the forefront and cause even the most reluctant Notre Dame Student to pick up The Observer and read the next level of rhetorical sparring.

When The Observer is in the midst of a Viewpoint War, their e-mail inbox is flooded with letters and comments about the controversy.  Even the most passive Notre Dame Student wants to get their two cents in and takes to their laptop to pen the most passionate (and usually predictable) argument possible.  The section becomes dominated by the single topic for days and weeks (or, in the case of Obama, months), and columns or letters not pertaining to the war simply fall by the wayside.

Viewpoint Wars are important because they depict Notre Dame Students at their best (or, more often, at their worst).  While they are always overblown, they depict the issues that are important to the student body, and the ones that are most controversial amongst the student body.  They get the students actively talking about topics, and they throw the most troublesome issues into the limelight.  Because of this, Notre Dame Students love Viewpoint Wars.

#65: Riding Bikes in Adverse Conditions

One of the great things about Notre Dame’s campus is that the residential and academic buildings are all relatively close together.  Students can easily walk between the most distant buildings of importance (so, not including Carroll) without exerting an inordinate amount of time or effort.  This pedestrian campus is promoted by an abundance of sidewalks and a lack of cars on campus.

Despite the convenient layout of campus, many students still feel the need to pretend like they are going to a large state school by riding their bikes between buildings.  Because of the short distances, these students will undoubtedly spend more time locking their bike then they will actually riding it (because locking bikes is necessary to prevent them from being stolen—or even worse, finding them hanging in a tree somewhere).

While this biking can be seen merely as a leisure activity in the summer months, Notre Dame Students inexplicably continue to ride their bikes in the inclement weather that lasts from October until May (see #43).  Whether it is snow, sleet, ice, hail, wind, or rain, the biking contingent of Notre Dame Students are relentless like postal workers in their insistence on biking.

These students will put plastic bags on the seats of their bikes to ensure dryness, and then they will hit the ice-covered sidewalks in their perilous quest from their dorm to DeBartolo Hall to the Dining Hall and back.  Never worrying about the inevitable loss of traction, these students will slide across the sidewalk, crash into pedestrians, and get even wetter than their sensibly walking counterparts.

Ultimately, most students will realize that bicycles were simply not built to be ridden around in the adverse conditions of the South Bend winter.  These students, however, will choose not to leave their bike in one place throughout the winter, but will walk their bike across the slick and icy sidewalks so that it will still be with them when the day comes that conditions are more desirable for biking.

#64: Omelets

Like most college students, those at Notre Dame are fairly apathetic towards breakfast.  With the majority of students only having 14 meals on their meal plan each week, and the breakfast hours of the dining halls incompatible with the schedules of many students, there is just no time or place for a traditional breakfast during the typical week.  Most students settle for a bagel and coffee from Waddick’s or Starbucks.

When students do get breakfast in the dining halls, however, they typically make sure to get the omelets from the omelet bars in both dining halls. 

Some students go to the omelet bar regularly throughout the week.  These students have their chosen ingredients set and they get to know the omelet makers quite well throughout their omelet making careers.  Other students only utilize the omelet bar on the weekends when it is a brunch option much later in the day.  These students find that the omelets do great work on hangovers and help the students prepare for a full day of studying.  They eat their omelets while recapping the debauchery of the previous night and thinking through the things they wish they hadn’t done (see #11, doing things that are SO college).

Further students only eat their omelets for special occasions.  Some make special trips to breakfast on mornings when they have early exams and enjoy their omelet as a sort of pre-test pump up meal.  Some students only get omelets when the monogram waffle-makers have gone missing.  Other students make a point to specifically go to the omelet bars the morning after they have pulled an all-nighter.  These omelets act as a triumphal post-game treat after a long night of studying or paper writing.

Overall, most Notre Dame Students find a way to work the occasional omelet into their diet, and the omelet bar is certainly one of the most beloved menu items at either dining hall.

>Note: The pictured omelet is NOT from either Notre Dame dining hall.

#53: Chipotle

By the end of their freshmen year, Notre Dame Students will look for any reason to go off-campus for meals.  Having tested every possible combination of food in their dining hall of choice, Notre Dame Students get into the cars that they weren’t allowed to have when they first arrived and seek out eateries on and around the Grape Road corridor (because that’s the only place students know how to get to).

Of all the eateries that Notre Dame Students frequent, none is as popular or beloved than Chipotle.  Notre Dame Students love the taste of their overly processed fake Mexican food just as much as they love any of the items on this list, and for many years they had been more than willing to take 90 minutes out of their busy days to drive to Mishawaka to satisfy their craving for burritos. 

This week, however, a new Chipotle location is opening in the Eddy Street Commons.  Because the Chipotle is the one place within this overly sterilized downtown area that Notre Dame Students will actually frequent, it is the only place that they have been waiting for. 

Because of the degree to which Notre Dame Students love Chipotle, it goes without saying that this location will quickly become the busiest Chipotle in the world (just like the Subway in LaFortune . . or not) because Notre Dame Students will now be able to ride their bikes or even walk to the location. 

Before long, this eatery will be so successful that the dining halls will have to examine their profit margins, Rocco’s will have to increase their already exorbitant prices, and off-campus students will do far less cooking than the trivial amount they currently do.  With a Chipotle closer to campus than Carroll Hall, Notre Dame Students will see little to no reason to explore other dining options. 

#46: The Question of the Day

Notre Dame Students do not really seem to like The Observer all that much.  Sure, many students grab a copy at lunch and read a few articles in Sports or Viewpoint*, but overall the paper is not the most popular reading material for Notre Dame Students (although its far more popular than its ugly stepbrother The Irish Rover).  However, if there is one section that most students are sure to read every day, it is The Question of the Day.

The Question of the Day appears every day on the second page (behind the front page) of The Observer.  It consists of: a question (duh), and usually five pictures of students giving brief answers to the question that was asked.  The question that is asked can range from being completely serious and controversial to something that is completely ridiculous and barely comical.

Examples of potential questions include:

-What is your favorite dining hall food?

-How angry do the Vagina Monologues make you?

-Do you prefer sweatpants that are blue or grey?

-How do you feel about Bill Kirk?

-Are you going to The Show this weekend?

Regardless of what question is asked, the answers always come from very typical responses.  One student will answer with a phrase that has almost no relation to the question that was asked.  One student will answer the question completely seriously as if it is an important survey.  Two students will answer together, usually by mentioning the others name and pointing towards them in the pictures.  Finally, another student will answer with a question as if they are asking for elaboration of the original question. 

All of these students might make completely ridiculous statements, but they will all be incredibly happy when the paper is actually published because they finally made it into The Question of the Day.  Their picture will appear in the newspaper and people will comment about their statement, no matter how absurd, for the rest of the day.  This will probably be one of the best days of the student’s collegiate career.

Because the people who respond to the question are chosen by a top-secret process that The Observer folks will never reveal, it is impossible to seek out being featured in The Question of the Day.  Whether it happens to people who are in the right place at the right time, or to people who know the right people, The Question of the Day is one of the highest honors that a student can achieve, but one they can never possibly seek out. 

*Notre Dame Students might, from time to time, read the News section of the paper if something interesting is happening, but they will certainly never read any article pertaining to Saint Mary’s unless it is a part of some sort of Viewpoint War.

#44: Calling their Mother while walking to class

Cell phones.

The spread of cell phones into ubiquity has irreversibly changed the lives of Americans over the past decade. Pay phones are a thing of the past, landlines are becoming rarer by the day, and people have become closer to each other than ever before. Because of cell phones, people are always able to find each other, and they are always able to contact each other; but it doesn’t necessarily mean they should.

At Notre Dame, Students unquestionably reap the benefits of cell phones (and the expanded coverage on campus) but the most questionable use of this technology by Notre Dame Students is the constant desire to call their mothers while walking between classes.

Hey, Mom, it’s Katie . . . yea, I just got out of class and am walking to lunch right now. . . I don’t think I did as well on the Anthro test today . . . oh, but don’t worry, I’m getting my Spanish paper back today, and I’m pretty sure I aced it . . . yea, I just like wrote the whole thing in English and then had the computer translate it . . . ok, Mom, I gotta go, I just got to the dining hall and there will probably be a long line for hummus. Love ya.

While calling Mom certainly isn’t a bad thing to do on a regular basis; it is bizarre that many students believe the best time to do this is during the four minute walk from South Dining Hall to DeBartolo. Never mind the fact that strong winds along the South Quad corridor might make it difficult for Mom to hear them explain the proper technique for slapping a bag of Franzia; a private conversation is impossible while walking along a crowded sidewalk in the middle of campus.

What is most shocking about these conversations is the degree to which Notre Dame Students share minutiae with their mothers. Certainly Mothers care about whether or not their children are in relationships, but it is borderline unhealthy for a student to tell their mother about each and every hook-up they have (Notre Dame Hook-Up, of course, see #21). However, these conversations can be heard near-daily on the sidewalk outside O’Shag.

Hi Mom it’s Meg . . . I’m walking back to BP right now . . . yea, we went to Club Fever last night, and I got pretty drunk on Vodka Cranberries . . . ok, wait, can you hold on while I walk through this building . . . [pause while walking through Stepan Chemistry Hall] . . . sorry, I gotta go, I just ran into Patrick and he’s gonna buy me Starbucks with his flex points . . . ok, later Mom.

While calling home for such a brief period of time makes little to no sense from a conversational and communicational standpoint, it is also rude to other people walking near these students on the sidewalk. Unlike Mom, most Students do not need to be serenaded with mindless stories about their lives and while cell phone reception is excellent, it still requires them to talk obnoxiously loud while walking across the quads.

#38.5: Things Saint Mary’s Students Like

1) Calling themselves “Smick Chicks”

2) The Avenue

3) Taking pictures on the “Sluttle”

4) Having Mothers who went to SMC and Fathers who went to Notre Dame

5) Taylor Swift

6) Working in Hospitals or Schools instead of taking classes

7) The Dance Marathon

8) Buying Food at the Cyber Café

9) Paying Their Student Government a Salary

10) Going out on weeknights

11) Oddly Shaped Dining Hall Trays

12) Notre Dame Athletes

13) Obnoxiously big dorm hallways

14) The Keenan Revue (ironically)

15) Getting Hooded

16) Jamaica Shaika

17) Being on Committees

18) Club Fever

19) Complaining about Traffic

20) Most (if not all) of the Things Notre Dame Students Like

#36: Saying that SDH Inspired the Harry Potter Movies

With today’s premiere of Harry Potter and the something or other, it is not only necessary but pertinent to discuss the love that Notre Dame Students have for all things Harry Potter. It’s not surprising that Notre Dame Students love a children’s book such as Harry Potter. While some students have organized Harry Potter activities, one Notre Dame Student apparently made lots of cash by developing a Harry Potter themed website*.

Notre Dame Students love Harry Potter so much that they incessantly claim that South Dining Hall inspired the Great Hall of Hogwarts in the Harry Potter film series. While this claim does have some valid points (such as both dining halls containing high ceilings, long tables, and chairs), Notre Dame Students repeat it far too much for their own good.

These students will tell anybody who will listen that their dining hall inspired Hogwarts. They tell their parents, they tell prospective students, and they tell anybody willing to go on a tour of campus that SDH inspired Hogwarts. However, this legend is completely false as it is well documented that Christ Church College at Oxford served as inspiration for the sets of Harry Potter.

Regardless, many Notre Dame Students will continue to believe that South Dining Hall inspired the Harry Potter series. These same students will continue to play mock games of Quidditch and they will continue to love this series of books and films.

*Apparently there is more money in a Harry Potter website than in a Notre Dame a website, but who’s complaining.

#33: Trivia

Notre Dame Students love matching wits with other Notre Dame students.  They start pointless debates in dorms, classrooms, bars, parties, and dining halls that include just about any topic.  Politics, sports, religion, movies, history, literature, music, and television can all provide ample topics for Notre Dame Students to discuss, and they can all provide ample questions for Notre Dame Students to answer.

Because of this, Notre Dame Students love trivia.  They love all kinds of trivia.  Trivia games they can play alone in their free time, such as watching Jeopardy on TV or playing Sporcle.com (see #18) are useful tools to practice, but Notre Dame Students really love the competition.  Some will get this competition amongst their friends by playing trivia games at Buffalo Wild Wings or Trivial Pursuit on a slow night (or to pregame with MD 20/20 shots for each color pie). 

Random campus events that feature trivia will cause Notre Dame Students to come out in droves, and weekly events around campus and South Bend will encourage students to form teams that will battle to prove their wits.  Legend’s and Between the Buns are both popular locations for teams to compete that feature great team names such as Jesse and the Rippers or Drink Drank Drunk, and Notre Dame Students will do their best to win these events as often as possible.

The main reason that Notre Dame Students love trivia, however, is not just because they have an innate desire to compete, but because they want to prove that they are smarter than they next guy.  Through trivia outlets, students are able to prove who has more worthless knowledge in their mind, who reads the most random Wikipedia pages, who is the most in tune with popular culture, and who can form the brightest teams; all important aspects of smartness.  

#25: Planning Things

Because Notre Dame Students were all considered ‘leaders’ in high school, they all became accustomed to being followed by their peers in whatever they did.  These students were also used to planning events for student groups, classes, and social activities.  At Notre Dame, planning things takes on an entirely new level as Notre Dame Students overly plan every activity they do.

These activities can range from the trivial (dinner at the dining hall) to the complicated (travelling in Europe over Spring Break) to the unnecessarily complicated (planning dorm parties).  No matter what the activity is, there are usually multiple students in the group that want to take up the mantle of leader and do more planning than would ever be necessary to properly plan the event. 

Oftentimes these activities have something to do with drinking (see #11) where students constantly feel the need to make complicated plans about what they are going to do.  Drinking plans become take on a life of their own due to conflicting pregames, overly complicated party themes, bar crawls, party playlists, finding rooms for dorm parties, money collection, and the mere task of deciding which bar to go to.

Planning events for Notre Dame Students has become an even more complicated task because of technology.  Even a low key night might involve scores of text messages, emails, and Facebook wall posts.  A party (whether it be in a dorm or off-campus) will certainly involve several meetings, multiple ‘epic-length’ emails, a money collection process, debate over playlist options, and almost certainly the creation of a Facebook event.  These parties will certainly be fun for those that attend, but there is an abnormally high amount of planning that goes into a bunch of college students getting drunk.

While football weekends and special events bring out some fairly elaborate plans, the most over-planned times of the year are the weeks at the end of each semester.  In the winter everybody and their roommate feel the need to throw some sort of Christmas themed event.  Usually this entails cheesy sweaters, egg nog, and peppermint schnapps, and sometimes these events even include caroling and Christmas movies.  Off-campus students especially must be prepared to attend between four and eight Christmas parties just because each and every house or apartment that their friends live in will need to plan a party of their own (despite the fact that each of these parties will be the same).

However, the most overly planned time of the year is the end of Spring Semester when everybody wants to throw their own ‘Last Party of the Year’.  This planning reaches its climax at the end of Senior Week when each and every senior needs to plan an event for their friends and family.  Because these Seniors know that tendency of Notre Dame Students to overly plan events, they are sure to get their event on the calendar early (possibly as early as January) so that all of their friends will commit to it before others events are planned.  This inevitably ends with Notre Dame Seniors shuffling their parents from event to event the nights before commencement just so all of their friends are happy (on the plus side, they get really drunk in the process).  

#3: Using High Tuition Payments As An Excuse To Steal Shit

Notre Dame Students are proud that they attend a school that has an astronomically high tuition.  They know that this tuition is emblematic of how special their education really is and are grateful when their parents pay for it. 

However, Notre Dame Students also realize that the tuition is really, really high, and they use this fact to justify stealing things from the University.  The most popular place to steal things is the dining hall.  Many Notre Dame Students have entire sets of kitchen utensils that were smuggled out of the dining hall.  These students do not really consider these possessions as stolen goods because they paid too much to use them after all.

On-Campus students also take advantage of the system by helping themselves to as much food from CoMo and as many candles at the Grotto as they wish.  It doesn't matter if the money here is going to charity, because these students are paying a lot of money to be here.

Some off-campus students even take this to another level.  Monogram Waffle Irons, modular desk chairs, library staplers, Reckers salt and pepper shakers, DeBartolo Hall Toilet Paper, and towels from The Rock can all be seen at various off-campus residences because students feel a sense of entitlement to them because of their high tuition payments (and they don’t want to purchase these items).

The most notable stolen good is the Football Game Concession Stand Table.  Students steal these planks on nearly every football weekend so they can use them as beer pong tables.  While this vagrancy can probably be chalked up to drunken shenanigans, it probably would not happen if students did not feel that their high tuition payments entitled them to everything they lay their eyes on.